Category Archives: Health and Fitness
How to Feel Alive Again
Often, we are just going through life without really enjoying or being fully present. Without a sense of vitality, we go through life without feeling alive each day, and our contentment is frequently influenced by the outcomes of our actions.
Every morning we get out of bed, shower, brush our teeth, have breakfast, drive to work, lose track of time in our work, return home, complete our chores, and prepare to go to sleep. We do this every single day. We restart the cycle the next day and do it all over again.
Are We Alive?
We no longer seem to be as enthusiastic about life as we were when we were younger. I guess that the adolescent years are an exhilarating time in your life. Because you’re having a good time every day, you are content. And you’ve got big plans for what you’d like to do after college.
But sadly, things began to shift. It’s easy to fall victim to the illusion that life isn’t as exciting as it should be once you begin working and living independently. Your everyday life suddenly becomes a series of predefined plans and steps that seems boring and less interesting. It is like we stop living completely.
Here are some quick solutions to help you feel more alive again if you are feeling low:
1. Set Smart Goals
If you want to rediscover your zest for life and feel alive again, you must set yourself smart goals. You need a goal to get back into the swing of things, whether it’s about money or you want to go for a vacation.
Smart goals have a specific timeline to achieve them. By simply taking time to set your goals and your to-do list, you will feel alive. The simple act of breaking your bigger goals into smaller achievable goals makes everything easier to achieve and easier to handle.
2. Try out a New Skill
Your brain will go to sleep mode if you don’t practice something new every day. You either use it or lose it! Learn a new skill and bring something fresh to your life. It could be something you are interested in or a talent that you wish to master.
The technicality of learning something new will keep you alive and your brain will be working hard to ensure you achieve it. But this will require deliberate practice every day to improve. You should not let any day pass without practicing the skill.
3. Read a book
Whether you are a fan of books or not, to feel alive again, you should read books. Books help us to connect to the authors or the characters and experience life differently. When you read about the life experience of someone else, fiction or real, you get to understand how someone else would have handled the situation that you are in.
Books are the easiest way to travel the world and enjoy the experience of different countries, religions, ethnicity, and cultures. By so doing, you will feel alive again just by acknowledging that there are some people out there dealing with even more complicated situations than you are in at the moment.
read moreFive Easy Ways to Get Your Brain to Focus on What Matters
Your brain is the most complicated organ in your entire body. It controls all the activities of the body, whether you are asleep or awake. Because of this, our brain is constantly switching its attention from one thing to the other in split seconds. Getting your brain to focus on one item can be overwhelming.
However, for maximum productivity, you should learn how to get your brain to focus on what matters. Productivity is only realized by focusing on the critical tasks that pay us the most. When your brain wanders all over with a different type of thought, and you allow it, that will become your default way of thinking. And this may lead to reduced productivity and a lack of motivation to achieve your task.
So, how do you get your brain to focus on what matters and discard anything that will cause destruction?
Here are five ways to get your brain to Focus on Important Matter
You are what you think, and not the other way round. Therefore, the first step to getting your brain to focus is to first think about focus. That way, you will be aware of what is causing the destruction. You will be away from the environmental, physical, and emotional factors that affect your focus.
Here are some simple but very effective ways to get your brain to focus on what matters most:
1. Customize Your Environment for Focus
As I mentioned earlier, the most complex organ in your body is your brain. The second most complicated organ is your eye. Because of this that 50% of your brain is dedicated to processing visual data from the eye. What does this mean?
It means that what you see will determine what and how you think. Therefore, if you want your brain to focus on what matters, your environment should be full of only the important stuff that matters most. Failure to do so will keep your brain from wandering from one thing to the other that it sees.
2. Re-energize Your Body Regularly
Your brain is the Central Processing Unit (CPU) for your body. Therefore, like the computer CPU, it uses most of the resources from the body. Because of this, you have to take good care of your body for the optimal functioning of your brain.
This can be achieved by exercising and taking regular health and meditative breaks. When you exercise your body, the flow of blood to your brain will be enhanced, and so is your ability to focus on what matters.
3. Eliminate Negative Thoughts
We are emotional beings. And our thinking is likely to be swayed by what we feel inside. Because of this, you should ensure you fill your brain with positive thoughts only. That way, you will think clearly through things and come up with even better ideas. When you have negative thoughts, you are likely to have a biased way of thinking. Also, negative thoughts will make you lose focus on the most important things.
4. Develop a System and Stick to It
When you are engaged in complex and repetitive activities like writing, reading, etc. It is important to develop a system that will allow you to focus. You can do this by using the Pomodoro technique. This technique states that you divide your activity into smaller sub-activities that you can achieve in 25 minutes. Then takes a short break of 5 minutes between each Pomodoro. That way, your brain can easily focus on the task at hand for 25 minutes without straining.
5. Observe Your Overall Health
Lastly, what you eat is what you get! Okay, I just made that up, but what it means, when you are hungry, your brain will not focus on the task at hand. Your brain will be wandering around thinking of how you will get your next meal. Therefore, before you sit down to work on any task, make sure you are well fed. Too much food will also make you lose focus because the brain will handle the digestive system. Therefore, only eat enough.
Final Thought
Above all, you should be mindful of what you feed your brain. As it said in Information Technology (IT), Garbage in Garbage Out (GIGO). So, ensure you provide your brain with positive thoughts and keep learning new things by reading and consuming valuable information. That way, your brain will automatically know what to take in and what to keep out. With consistent practice, these will become easy and automatic processes for your brain. You will be able to easily focus on what matters with little or no effort.
read moreHow To Keep Your Dark Side At Bay
It is often said that everyone has a dark side. This may be true, but it is also important to remember that we all have the capacity for good as well. The key is to find a balance between the two and to keep your dark side in check.
One of the best ways to do this is to stay mindful of your thoughts and actions. If you find yourself thinking negative thoughts, take a step back and examine why you are thinking them. Are they really true? Is there another way to look at the situation?
It is also important to be aware of your actions. If you find yourself doing something that you know is wrong, ask yourself why you are doing it. Is it really worth it? Is there another way to get what you want?
Why is it important to keep your dark side in check?
We all have a dark side. It’s the part of us that is selfish, violent, and angry. It’s the side that wants to lash out when we’re hurt, take what we want without regard for others, and give in to our worst impulses.
For most of us, the dark side is something to be controlled and kept in check. After all, if we gave into it every time we felt anger or frustration, the world would be a very different place.
Instead, we try to teach ourselves and our children to control their emotions, resolve conflicts peacefully, and act with empathy and compassion. In other words, we try to keep our dark side in check. While it’s not always easy, it’s important. Because if we can’t control our dark side, it will control us.
In order to keep your dark side in check, consider the following:
Understand your dark side – take some time to think about what makes you angry, frustrated, or violent. What are the triggers that make you lose control?
Acknowledge your triggers—once you know what sets off your dark side, try to avoid those situations or resolve them in a different way.
Don’t be afraid to express your dark side-it’s okay to feel anger, frustration, or pain. But instead of lashing out, try to express those emotions in a constructive way.
Don’t let your dark side take over – if you find yourself in a situation where you’re about to lose control, take a step back and breathe. Count to ten, walk away or do whatever you need to do to calm down.
Seek professional help if needed – if you find that you can’t keep your dark side in check, don’t be afraid to seek professional help. A therapist can help you understand and manage your emotions in a healthy way.
Practice self-care – finally, it’s important to take care of yourself. Make sure to eat well, get enough sleep, and exercise. These things will help you stay physically and mentally healthy, which will in turn make it easier to keep your dark side in check.
How to stay mindful of your thoughts and actions.
It can be easy to get caught up in the busyness of life and lose track of our thoughts and actions. However, it is important to be mindful of our inner dialogue and how we treat others.
One way to stay mindful is to take a few moments each day to check in with yourself. Notice how you are feeling mentally and physically. Are your thoughts kind and compassionate? Are you treating others with respect?
If not, what can you do to change your thoughts and actions? Another way to stay mindful is to set aside some time each week for reflection. During this time, reflect on your week—what went well and what could have gone better.
What did you learn from your successes and failures? The more aware we are of our thoughts and actions, the more control we have over them. By making a conscious effort to be mindful, we can improve our well-being and the well-being of those around us.
Other ways for staying mindful of your thoughts and actions include:
- Be aware of your inner dialogue
- Check in with yourself regularly
- Set aside time for reflection
- Control your emotions
- Treat others with respect and compassion.
How to be aware of your actions.
It is important to be aware of your actions and how they may affect others. This can be done by thinking about the potential consequences of your actions before you do them.
For example, if you are considering saying something that could be hurtful to someone, ask yourself whether it is worth saying. If the answer is no, then it is probably best to keep your thoughts to yourself.
Another way to be aware of your actions is to put yourself in other people’s shoes. Try to see things from their perspective and think about how they might feel in different situations.
By doing this, you will be more likely to act in a way that is considerate and respectful of others.
The takeaway
It is important to keep your dark side in check. One way to do this is to stay mindful of your thoughts and actions. If you find yourself thinking or doing something that could be harmful to yourself or others, take a step back and examine why you are doing it.
Is it really worth it? Is there another way to handle the situation? When we take the time to be aware of our thoughts and actions, we are more likely to make choices that are in line with our values and that will lead to positive outcomes for ourselves and others.
How to find a balance between your dark side and your good side.
We all have a light and a dark side. The light side is associated with positive qualities like happiness, kindness, and love. The dark side is associated with negative qualities like anger, hatred, and jealousy.
Finding a balance between these two sides is essential for a happy and healthy life. When our dark side gets the upper hand, we may find ourselves acting in ways that we later regret.
We may say hurtful things to our loved ones or make poor decisions that can have lasting consequences. On the other hand, if we suppress our dark side too much, we may become disconnected from our own emotions and end up leading an unfulfilling life.
The key is to find a balance between the two. Allow yourself to feel your negative emotions, but don’t let them control you. Recognize when your dark side is starting to take over and take steps to bring yourself back into balance. By doing so, you’ll be able to lead a more balanced and fulfilling life.
read moreHow to Turn Simple Disciplines into Massive Success and Happiness
What is your definition of happiness? It is about money, respect, inventing something amazing? You likely have thought about this question more than once and have a clear idea in your mind of what you think ultimate success is, however, actually achieving success and happiness might seem a bit too far. The key is not jumping into success, but utilizing simple disciplines to achieve the ultimate happiness and success goal. Here are some tips to turn simple disciplines into massive success and happiness for your life.
Understand the Importance of Every Day
These days, it seems as though every day is running together. Whether you are working from home, helping kids with school, or among our essential workers still droning on as normal as possible, days can sometimes get away from us, but it is important to find something to ground you. You must take back the day and realize that every day, no matter what is going on, is important. Start the day by noting the actual date and day of the week. It seems a little silly, but noting each day can help realize its individual importance and the fact that you will never get that particular date back ever again. Count each day as vital to your success and a stepping stone to your ultimate happiness.
Value Meditation Time
You have a routine that you do every day. That is great, but what about time to really connect with yourself through meditation or prayer? You will find that when you research successful people, they all have something they believe to be a way to ground their life. Meditation or prayer seems to be the most common entities.
Taking time at some point throughout the day to simply be silent, think on the day, pray, or do something else that is just for you. This time is vital to your overall success. These small, still moments allow you to have just a little time to visualize the end goal of success. For some, this time will be during the morning before the family rises for the day and the house is quiet. For others, it might be at the end of the day to help download what happened during the day and what can be done to make the next day even more of a success.
Write Things Down
When was the last time you wrote out a schedule for your day? If you are like most of us, you simply wake up and do the same thing every day without the thought to write things down. However, some of the most successful people you will ever meet are those that discipline themselves to write out a schedule of daily tasks. There is something unique about writing down tasks. It seems to solidify them in your mind. You have a clear-cut goal in mind and a timeline available to get it all done.
Writing out a daily schedule can become a healthy habit, but it takes time to get started. Start out by writing out simple things such as when you intend on getting up, eating, and sleeping. You can work in detail throughout the day until you have a full schedule. Soon, you will find comfort in scheduling and it will become automatic to you. This is just a simple way to begin to organize your life and reach your ultimate success and happiness goals.
Let Nothing Get in Your Way
It seems as though no matter who you are or what your goals may be, there is always something that stands in your way. You will start out strong with great intentions and something ultimately tears you down during the process of achieving your goals. Bumps in the road will happen. Failures will occur, but what you have to have set in your mind is that nothing is going to stop you. When setbacks happen or something tries to get in your day, move on. It might put you down for a little time, but get back up and try again. Never back down.
Ultimate happiness and success are different for everyone. However, knowing what you want is a universal concept. Take time to write down your goals and see what it is, exactly that you want. Find out what true success and happiness look like for your life. Remember, it is about what you want, so do not compare yourself to the success of others. These simple disciplines will help you begin to build a roadmap to your ultimate success and happiness goals. Remember, you are in control of your own destiny and bad habits can knock you off your path. Get back up, keep going, and let nothing stop you. You can achieve happiness and success.
read moreHow To Combat Career-Related Anxiety
The world we live in today is not what it had been just two decades ago. The situation is not just a result of the pandemic. Even before the virus threw our lives into disarray, the world had started to move in a very different direction. There has been an unrelenting sense of competition in the world for everything, right from good schools to doctoral studies and jobs. Throw onto that uncertainty brought on by the pandemic, and you have a recipe for disaster. If the job market was fickle before, it seems entirely insufferable now. Student’s careers hang in the balance due to the lack of proper examinations and the decreasing value of their qualifications, and they find themselves feeling dejected.
It would be wrong to say that this isn’t something to worry about because one’s career is undoubtedly a serious topic. Worrying about your career is only natural. The education system has been unfair to the youth. Young people no older than seventeen are expected to make binding decisions about what they want to do for the next few years, sometimes even for the rest of their lives. They are made to feel like not making the right decision is the end of the world. The pandemic has worsened this situation, even more, making people think they are missing out or lagging somehow.
The truth is that it is never too late to start your journey or to start over should the need arise. It may feel like time is slipping out of your hands, but it is essential to remember that life is only as forgiving as you are. Your career is important but what is more important is your health and happiness. If you worry about your career a lot, the most efficient fix is finding ways to move in a direction you find fitting for you. Following this, you can start setting goals and working towards them. Try to learn as much as you can about your career and the paths you can take. The more you know about it, the better your plans will be. Having foresight can allow you to progress faster and thus decrease anxiety.
If making plans and working towards them doesn’t help your anxiety, it may be time to reevaluate your workspace. Are you in a comfortable workspace? Do your superiors and colleagues treat you well? Is your work environment pleasant?
If your answer is no to any of these questions, that may factor into your work-related anxiety. We spend a large chunk of our time working, so a lot of our time is spent in the workspace, making it very important for the workspace to have a positive environment. If your environment is hostile, that will lead to anxiety about work and all aspects of it. You must check if your colleagues somehow contribute to your career-based fear. If so, try limiting the time you spend with such people and focus on your efforts. Once you tackle the issue of your workspace, it is imperative to work on your time. Make a schedule that comfortably balances your work and personal life. It is always a good idea to extricate your work life from your personal life so that neither bleeds into the other. If you’re able to maintain the balance, it will allow you to complete all your work on time and will enable you to rejuvenate and return to your work reinvigorated.
Career-based anxiety isn’t limited to working people. In fact, it wouldn’t be incorrect to say that more unemployed people suffer from these thoughts than working people. It is difficult to get jobs, but there are some things that one can do to make themselves more employable. The most crucial point is to obtain the relevant education to enter your field of interest. If you can not fulfill the basic qualifications for your dream job, then your dream ends right there. Get the right qualifications, and you will undoubtedly come a step closer to realizing your passion.
The next thing to remember with respect to combating career-based anxiety is never to stop learning. The moment you stop being receptive to new information is the day you start on the path of irrelevance. Keep yourself up to date with discoveries and trends concerning your career. Not only will this keep you sharp, but it will also make you more secure in your position. There is no age for learning. If you still find yourself dreading work or find yourself associating negative emotions with your career, it might be time to consider a change of pace. The difference could be anything from taking a break to switching jobs. If you feel like your current career may not be fulfilling, it is worth looking into picking a new career that you’re more passionate about pursuing.
If you find your anxiety isn’t getting better regardless of your efforts, you should seek external help. Talk to a therapist and see if they can chalk out a plan for you to manage your anxiety better. In addition to this, the fact that you have such intense anxiety about your career could be affecting your overall health and peace, making it all the more important to look after your physical and mental health. There is no shame in asking for help when you find yourself in a difficult situation.
One of the main takeaways is always to put your health and happiness above your career. You can only work efficiently if you’re in good health. Start by working yourself and watch your career anxiety lessen every day. If you find yourself in a job where you’re unhappy, it is always a good idea to look for more options. The point is to remember that you work to live a good life, not live so you can work. Set your goals, identify your priorities and do your best.
read moreHow To Be Motivated Every Day.
If you are like me, you must be having those days you call ‘bad days. Mondays have always been the victim of being a bad day. These are those days that you don’t even feel like waking up. And when you do, you don’t feel motivated to do anything, regardless of how important it is.
When this happens, you will probably end up procrastinating a lot, and sometimes you will hate everything or everyone around you. Many things can lead to being demotivated, these include; When you lose someone, or something you loved, e.g., job, divorce, death, etc.
Too much on your to-do list
Fear of failure
Self-doubt
Lack of self-confidence
Poor time management
Burnout from jobs
Easy Ways to Be Motivated and Stay Motivated Every Day
The first step in solving any problem is to understand the root cause of the problem. The issues above are just but a few of the things that may demotivate you. It is essential to understand the root cause of your lack of motivation so that you don’t address the symptoms rather than the problem itself.
Once you know what is bringing you down, you can adequately find solutions. But don’t beat yourself so much when this happens. It is very ok to have some down days. We cannot function the same for all 365 days in a year. Some days we will feel low. How you deal with such days will determine how successful you become.
Here are some simple steps you can take to stay motivated every single day permanently:
1. Practice Positive Affirmation
Motivation is hugely determined by how we feel inside. It is the manifestation of how we think about ourselves. When you doubt your abilities or have little or no self-confidence in your abilities, you will most likely feel demotivated to handle your daily tasks.
Therefore, you should practice saying positive things to yourself. A simple daily mantra can help you get your motivation to handle tasks. For example, you can tell yourself, “I can do it.” When you say this repeatedly, you will automatically be optimistic about your abilities to handle the day’s activities.
2. Take Some Time Off
Burnout can kill your motivation. If you want to stay motivated for the entire day, you need to take some health breaks from your core activities. This will help your body and mind to re-charge. When you work for so long on a task, your productivity will reduce. This will compromise the quality of your output.
It is vital to take some time off and meditate alone. For your peace of mind, you can take a few minute’s walks in the forest or a quiet place. This connection with nature will revitalize your mind and help you stay motivated to handle what is thrown at you during the day.
3. Avoid Perfectionism
Perfectionism is the number one killer of motivation and the lead cause of procrastination and failure to tackle our daily tasks. We often put things to another day when we feel motivated to do it. This is a bad move because you may never feel motivated enough to do it.
Especially when you are doing what you don’t love, here, you should stop thinking of delivering a perfect job, but just do what you can do within the shortest time possible and get feedback on it. That will motivate you to work on your next tasks.
4. Divide Your Activities into Smaller Achievable Sub-tasks
How long is your to-do list? If it is longer than one A6 size page, then that is the source of your demotivation. Also, more significant tasks seem to demotivate people and make them feel lazy to handle them.
What you should do is to divide the bigger task into small sub-task. And just work on a few of the tasks during the day. Achieving these smaller goals will eventually make you feel good and motivate you to work on even more complex tasks. Prioritize your tasks from the most important and urgent to the least urgent. Then work on the most important ones first.
5. Take Action Immediately
Lastly, taking prompt action on your tasks at hand is the only way to stay motivated. When tasks are left untouched, they will pile and kill your spirit. Therefore, it is important to work on your to-do list first thing in the morning.
Also, work on the most challenging tasks, or those that you are likely to procrastinate. As Brian Tracy says in his book “Eat That Frog,”. We should consider the most challenging task as a frog. They should be eaten first. When you wake up, tackle the “frog” first. Don’t be confused by the tadpoles (small and easy tasks). Concentrate on the complicated tasks first. That way, you will be motivated the whole day because you will know that you have handled the most challenging problem of the day. This will motivate you to handle the other smaller jobs with enthusiasm.
read moreHow To Navigate A Relationship When Your Partner Struggles With Mental Illness
Human beings are complex, social animals. We evolved to live in groups and form relationships within our communities. Most cues for these aspects of life come to us naturally. However, that doesn’t mean that forming and maintaining relationships is easy. While finding love is one of the most talked-about aspects of romance, it is the sustenance of said love that is most difficult.
There are various aspects of a successful relationship; there is the chemistry at the initial stages. It is impossible to find love without chemistry and so it is essential. Once you’re in the relationship, understanding each other comes into play. It is true that with chemistry, love, and understanding, relationships can be happy, healthy, and long. Life is not as straightforward and often there are a lot of external factors that affect relationships. More often than not these factors are out of the couples’ control and so it all comes down to being patient and taking the right decisions.
One such factor that can place a strain on relationships is mental illness. We live in a fast-paced world that doesn’t allow us enough time or energy to rest and recover. Mental illnesses are a part of our lives and there is no denying it. While there is a lot more understanding and insight into what these illnesses are and why they shouldn’t be stigmatized, it is still quite a challenge to navigate them in real life. Mental illnesses are hard on the people that are affected and so it is essential to get a diagnosis followed by help and support. It is very important for family, friends and partners to support people suffering from mental illnesses.
How does one ensure that they’re providing their partner with the right kind of help and support should they suffer from an illness? The most important thing is to know that the situation is central to your partner, not to you. However, it may be affecting your life, it affects their life more and they deserve your love, respect and support more than anything else. If you love your partner and are willing to do the work to make your relationship work, half the battle has been won. You can start by trying to find out more about your partner’s mental illness. Find out what they suffer from, talk to them about how they manage the illness, and see if there is anything you can do to help them manage their life better. Seek information about your partner’s diagnosis from reliable sources and avoid misinformation. You can also look into mental health organizations or support groups relevant to you and your partner. Knowing about the symptoms and implications of your partner’s diagnosis can help you create a good healing environment for them.
There are certain situations, however, where the best thing you can do for your partner is step back and let them have some space. You might want to be proactive in dealing with their diagnosis but it is a very personal matter, so being able to step back is just as important as being able to step up in this situation. Remember to treat your partner with respect and not disregard their opinion in how to handle their own diagnosis. While there are situations where your partner may need you to act on their behalf, this should not translate to you dictating their life. Taking decisions when your partner needs you to and taking decisions all the time are two very different things and should be kept separate.
Your partner may not always know that they’re suffering with a mental illness. They might start falling sick after you’ve been with them so keep an eye out for signs of them suffering. Don’t take any new conflicts in the relationship at surface level, see if there is a reason why your partner is stressed and upset. You need to be mindful in relationships and so be mindful of what you say and hear. Is there a change in the way your partner acts? Is there a change in their appetite? Has their lifestyle altered without explanation? Has your partner started to self-medicate with alcohol or nicotine? Keeping an eye on things like this can allow you to understand what state of mind your partner is in and if they need help from you and/or a professional. Medication and therapy go a long way when it comes to mental illness and an early diagnosis could spare your partner the pain of being misunderstood and untreated.
It is not easy to navigate life with a mental illness, remember that when with a partner struggling with one. The best thing you can do is communicate with your partner and find out what they need. The time following a diagnosis can be embarrassing for your partner. They may not feel like themselves for a while afterward so be mindful of their insecurities and doubts. If your partner asks for validation, give it to them because they need it. If your partner needs to be reassured of your feelings towards them; don’t take it personally. It is not a lack of trust in you but in themselves.
There will be times where you’ll do everything right and still not get the result you want and you have to learn to accept that. It takes time and patience to come up with a way of living that works for your partner’s healing path as well as your relationship. Be kind and patient. Remember that your partner is dealing with a lot of pressure and stress that may not even be related to you so don’t take things personally. The most important point when everything else has been taken care of is self-care. You need to keep yourself in good health and a pleasant mindset. Remember to take care of your own well-being as well because this can only work if both parties are moving towards good health. You cannot pour from an empty cup so continue to work on yourself as you work to ensure your partner’s healing and comfort.
Love is strong and overcomes a lot just as long as you put in sustained effort. Having a mental illness doesn’t have to be the end of the line for your love story.
read moreHow to leave work at `work`
The instance of burnout among professionals and students has increased in recent years. The problem seemed to become more potent with the onset of the pandemic. In a world where we already had trouble separating our personal and professional lives, we couldn’t have possibly stood the test of a pandemic too.
We have always been advised against mixing our personal and professional lives, and we have almost always failed to do so. While it may seem easy enough to do, it is actually easier said than done. With the prevalence of the ‘Hustle’ culture and the widening gap between minimum and livable wages, the lines between your job and life are blurred beyond recognition.
On hearing this, one may think that they have set proper boundaries. You may even feel the same as you read this article, but have you really set these boundaries? Do you not check your emails and answer work-related calls and texts after work and on-off time? Do you not bring back baggage from work and find yourself seething about it hours later? Do you not end up working at home despite being off the clock? If so, then you certainly do not separate work from your personal life.
Being able to separate the two is indeed a privilege reserved for people who either can not work outside of their workspace or who can afford to refuse to say no without losing their jobs. However, you can do certain basic things to avoid blurring the lines more than they have been already.
The first thing to remember is that you work to live a good life, not the other way around. People often start believing that their work is the only important thing in their lives. I agree that your job is essential and that it is why you’re able to live the life you’ve always wanted. However, you mustn’t let it overpower your entire life. You should not feel guilty about taking time off or planning vacations. The capitalistic nature of our society makes people treat their jobs as the only important thing in life, so they often place work above all else. A very toxic trait that has been bred in the minds of working professionals today is the glorification of the workaholic life. People carry the workaholic tag like a badge of honor on their chest rather than a crippling weight on their backs. Amid messages promoting working yourself to the bone and putting hard, laborious work above efficiency, people lose sight of reality and start equating their burnout to success. Hard work is undoubtedly the key to success, but that does not in any way take away from the importance of being efficient; just because your way of working is difficult doesn’t mean that it is the best.
You must never stop exploring and learning as long as you’re able to. Many people seem to get so tied up with work that they forget to do things just for themselves. We’re so caught up in trying to earn money, and we attach monetary significance to everything. It is vital to continue to have hobbies and interests outside of your job. It isn’t necessary to be really good at something; you can learn something new from scratch. Join a club, attend a class, a writing workshop, a painting class, pottery, anything that suits your fancy. If you don’t want to go out, you can read, dance, sing, and write anything you like. If you don’t want a hobby, join a club, a walking club, hiking club, book club, or anything that makes you feel happy. The point is to know that there is no age where you should stop working on yourself and your happiness.
Overworking and work-related stress have long been a reason for unrest among families. We spend a large part of the day at work. Much of our time and energy goes into it, so it is only natural to carry some of that energy into our personal lives. It is impractical to ask people to be utterly indifferent to the circumstance at work. Human beings cannot be completely unaffected by their surroundings, so it is natural to be receptive to the highs and lows of work life. Often these things bleed slowly into our personal lives and lead to quarreling and disturbances. While it may not be possible not to discuss your work with your friends and family, it is a good idea to keep the conversations to a minimum. You can come home and express your distress over something that happened at work, and you can even ask for advice. What you should not do, is take out your frustrations on people who do not even know what is bothering you. Communication is the best weapon to combat almost every vice out there. If you can communicate your work-related frustrations to your family, everyone involved will better handle the situation at home.
You may know someone who tries all of this yet cannot succeed at leaving their work in the workplace. You might even be someone who doesn’t find it easy to separate the two. We are taught a lot of covertly toxic things about work while we’re growing. We are taught that if you do not succeed at one job, that you’re a failure. We are taught to waste our time trying to achieve impractical goals rather than learning to move onward and upward. We hear maxims like ‘Do or die,’ but we’re rarely taught how to handle anything other than success and stellar results. We carry all this to our workspace and then wonder why we have an unhealthy relationship with work. Few people have the opportunity to learn how to live their life and work at the same time. There is no shame in being unable to cope with the pressure of work. It is perfectly normal to struggle to cope with work, and if you ever need some help with it, you could always go to a life coach or a therapist. Ultimately, the most important thing is to remember and cherish your individuality and life. Yes, work is essential, and yes, a lot rides on it but not everything.
So plan your work around your life, not vice versa, and you should be golden.
read moreHow To Face Life’s Challenges and Overcome Adversity
You cannot avoid adversity in life. Even the most sheltered and privileged individuals find themselves in adverse conditions at some point or the other. Adversity is not convenient, and it often throws a wrench in your plans, but there is no way around this aspect of life. You have to accept that as a part of life and focus on the consequences of these situations rather than worrying about the purpose. Some say that adversity is to be considered a test of strength, and they may be right. However, I feel like we glorify adversity, too, much like all else in life. Adversity is an inconvenience that you often cannot circumvent and should be treated as such. There have been various studies that have looked into the ways in which one can overcome adversity, the foremost being having resilience.
You must remember that not every single inconvenience in life is going to be the reason life ends. It is natural for things to go wrong from time to time, and you must accept that as soon as you identify a problem. Remember that you have been through difficult situations before, and you’ll go through more of them in the future. You are strong enough to deal with whatever has been sent your way. That is not to say that you need to deal with adversity alone. Talk to your friends and family. Acknowledge and accept their help because you are not alone in your situation. More often than not, we start to take pride in how little help we ask for, but no one gets a medal for doing things the hard way. You will not receive one either. Make your life easy by asking for and accepting help when necessary.
The second thing to focus on is your surroundings. Surround yourself with positive people who are rooting for you. Your surroundings can affect your mood as well as your response to adversity. You are vulnerable in times of adversity, so the effect is even more pronounced. The right guidance at the right time. People who accept mistakes and understand how they are an essential part of life Supportive people who favor your success. While your surroundings are greatly influenced by the people around you, it is also dependent on your own mindset. Write about your feelings, and make sure you check any negative thoughts you might be having. Keep track of how you feel and how you’re responding to your surroundings. Do not indulge in self-loathing and try to be reflective instead. Understand your situation after recovering from its initial shock and move on from it when you’re comfortable doing so. Accept the situation and start to look for ways to solve your problem. It might seem like a herculean task, but the best thing to do in times of adversity is to get busy. Put your energy into making things better, and you’ll thank yourself once the situation has been resolved. In the midst of all this, do not forget to express your feelings through your writing. Eventually, you’ll be able to track your progress over time, allowing you to remember that no matter how bad things get, you can always make it through.
The modern world is full of wonderful technology, which makes our lives easier, but it is not without its limitations. One major limitation is the introduction of one more aspect of life for us to worry about. This could be anything from your social media presence to the inability to regulate how available you want to be to the people contacting you. While one may deal with these reasonably well in good times, it may not be as easy to do so in difficult times. Take a break from technology and social media in whatever capacity suits you. This ties in with the fact that you are the most important person in your life. Prioritize taking care of yourself before you take care of others. Try to take nature walks or sit in the fresh air if it is possible for you. Research shows that outdoor activities and immersion in nature reduce stress, so try to get some sunlight every day and follow your body’s natural circadian rhythm to allow for recovery.
Life has strange ways of teaching you lessons you don’t realize you need. It is important to remember to keep your eyes and mind in times of adversity to allow the learning to continue. You might see your relationships more clearly in your time of need. You can identify your own habits that may have been holding you back. Invest in your own development. Make time for yourself and make improvements to the quality of your life. You cannot pour from an empty cup, so even if you are more inclined to care for others, know that you can’t keep doing that if you’re not feeling happy and satisfied.
There will always be adversity in life, and you can be sure of that. However, none of these are situations you can not survive. The adversity can result from your actions, or it can be entirely out of your hand. The key is not to take it personally. Don’t waste your time wondering why you’ve been dealt a bad hand. Take this time to introspect and work on making sure you don’t have the same problem twice. Things will be out of your control sometimes. There will be times when the only thing to do will be to let go. In situations like that, learn to practice satisfaction and detachment. Don’t get comfortable in your misery, and it is easy to become complacent to your situation. The challenge is to take every adversity and face it head-on with the clear intention to overcome it. Know that you are capable, and you’ll surely succeed.
read moreHow To Stop The Spiral Of Toxic Thoughts
The downward spiral is a fancy name for that nagging feeling in the back of your mind that doesn’t let you be at peace no matter how hard you try. In more psychologically relevant terms, the spiral refers to the feedback of negative thoughts and emotions, often as a result of a trigger. Downward spirals are often misunderstood and lead to advice such as, “Stop thinking so much” and, “Have you tried to chill out?”
Popular culture often represents this spiral as an endearing trait of a neurodivergent character that their love interest can fix in quick and, in my opinion, unimaginative ways. However, the downward spiral is not that and is wildly misrepresented like most things related to mental health.
The truth is that the sinking feeling that accompanies these thoughts is not endearing in the least. The thoughts don’t just pass over a person like a soft breeze, they hit you like a tidal wave, and it is exhausting to keep afloat. We eventually give in to the fiend and find ourselves recalling painful incidents that we’d normally like to forget. We pick on ourselves and become the enemy that we would otherwise avoid. We force ourselves to consider every possible thing that could go wrong in life and start to walk down the slippery slope of despair. The cyclical thoughts of repressed emotions and experiences, negativity, and self-loathing go on and on till you can either shock yourself back to reality or seek help from someone who can do that for you.
Why do we find ourselves in this place?
The answer is not as complex as one may assume. The downward spiral is often an amalgamation of our guilt, humiliation, anger, and gloom. We often dwell on the wrong things in life. It doesn’t matter how much time has passed. It doesn’t matter if we’ve made peace with it. It doesn’t even matter if you’re happier now than you were when these things first happened. Once there is an inconvenience that triggers you, the thoughts are sure to follow. Ask yourself, what is it that bothers you during a downward spiral? Is it not things that hurt you as a child? Is it not something/someone that isn’t a part of your life anymore said to you? Is it not the same insecurities you usually tuck away in a rarely visited corner of your mind? Is it not thoughts that you usually recognize as useless and untrue? If the answer to any of those questions is yes, then know you are not alone. We are humans, and it is our nature to ruminate. Introspection and reflection are a part of our life. The only thing to be looked at here is the way in which you go about it.
The most important thing to remember in your journey towards peace is always being mindful of what you do. Understand what you’re doing, be deliberate in your efforts, and know your motivations. The trajectory of your life is yours to decide, so it is your job to treat it in a hands-on fashion. Understand what leads to you spiraling and be prepared. Practice forgiveness towards yourself and others. It might be difficult to forgive people, and I do not recommend forcing it. However, being forgiving towards yourself is non-negotiable. Remember to be kind to yourself if you find yourself getting stuck in a spiral. Everyone makes mistakes, and yours are neither unique nor novel. You should be content with the mundane nature of our existence. Years of human life and countless people have made it nearly impossible to create a new mistake. Even if you make a new one, know that you won’t be the last to do it and live in peace with that knowledge.
We often process loss in ways that are not healthy for us. The downward spiral of negativity is one such unhealthy coping mechanism. Some say that it is oddly satisfying to vocalize every negative emotion you’ve ever had. Others say that self-medicating with alcohol, nicotine, and such help. They may be somewhat right about both, but it is essential not to turn it into a habit. If you go down the path of self-loathing and spiraling every once in a while, it is a normal derivative of the kinds of lives we’re living. However, if you do this at every minor inconvenience, then it is unhealthy and requires intervention. You can’t keep destroying your health and life because you’re having a bad time. Don’t self-medicate, don’t indulge your negativity, and try to hold onto the happier memories in your life. If you can’t check yourself as you start spiraling, talk to someone who can tell you precisely what you need to know. Write down reminders and affirmations for yourself so that you can hold onto your reality rather than getting washed away in the momentary wave of anxiety. Seek counseling if you feel like the spiral might be eating away at your life. It is never too late to ask for help.
We all wish there were an easy fix to everything in life, but there rarely is. We are complex beings, and it is only natural to experience complex emotions. Do not beat yourself up over how you feel. Try to understand why you’re there and start moving forward. If you feel like you can’t deal with the emotions alone, talk to someone you trust. Seek professional help if required and do whatever it takes to live your best life. You deserve acceptance, love, and peace. Know and accept them and be determined to achieve serenity. Sometimes you’ll fix a bad day with some sunlight and exercise, and others will need something stronger. Regardless of how you get there, the end goal is to be at peace, and you will get there sooner or later.
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